Thursday, 13 October 2011

Life :D

Finally, after almost three months, I've the courage to speak up to you and I've the courage to listen to myself. I'm seriously missing you so much right now but at least I am living my life the way I want right now. Loving you was an interesting mistake I made that I would never regret. I initially hoped that you were the one for me but you turned out to be a possessive maniac in the end -,-
I just hope that I will never see you again in my life because I will break and fall apart.

An amazing HUMAN BEING NOW ,

Thursday, 6 October 2011

My Life

What the @#$% !! I hate it when someone dictate's my life. But at the same time I love him so much. What should I do ? I'm BLANK !! In serious need of my friends Intan, Syaza and Aliyah :(

I miss my old life where no one gets to tell me what to do. Where I am my own boss of my own life. Where I get to do everything and anything I want without thinking about anyone. Where I get to express my feelings freely. Where I get to have feelings over and over again for different guys. Where I am who I am and not what a guy tries to make out of me! I miss it so much that I just hoped that I didn't fall for him in the first place and all this won't happen.

Thursday, 29 September 2011

Semester Break :(

Exams finally over after 10 days of crucial pain and hardwork ! I'm so happy but wait I'm gonna head back home after this and I'll be leaving behind the most valuable part of my life, MYFRIENDS Intan and Syaza :(
I'll miss you guys from the bottom of my heart ! Thanks for being there for me 24/7 !! Melayan semua kerenah and perasaan aku :) Balik nanti aku mesti rindu nak teman Intan pergi toilet every night and gaduh dengan kau Syaza setiap hari pasal benda yang tak masuk akal kan ? Hahahahh
I'll miss every moment we spent together. Makan, mandi, keluar, tidur, gaduh, nangis, gelak semua aku buat dengan korang selama 4 bulan lebih ni. Entah la macam mana lepas nie kan ?
I'LL MISS YOU GUYS AND I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH !!! Jangan lupa kat aku tau. Okay tulis blog ni pun sebenarnya nak kena nangis ke ?
Untunglah boleh nangis sorang2 dalam bilik ni kan ? AWKWARD - AWKWARD !!

Miss you guys :) ,

Wednesday, 28 September 2011


Haha exam today was like pfft ~ Memang dah pukul 4 lebih la baru Intan nak aku dengan Syaza ajak pergi Midvalley ?
But apa pun it was fun sebab we spent at least a few hours kat dalam bas untuk nak ke Midvalley. Reached at approximately 8 o'clock. Okay teman Intan buat segala yang dia nak buat then memang terbaik tunggu bas then bila dah ada bas memang dah terlalu lambat la kan? Haha but however the journey back to Shah Alam, we had to stand all the way back. But anyways, I had fun, dapat release la jugak tension dengan segala stress. :)

Monday, 26 September 2011

First Time. Weee ~

Today I had no exams. MyBabyBoo ajak jumpa so yeayyyy :D Hahahh happy sangat sebab this is the first time we're seeing each other face to face. Okay dia datang dalam pukul 12 lebih then we went to Section 7 Shah Alam. Duduk lepak and minum. Dia bawak kawan. Although, I was having bad food poisoning but to be with him is like AMAZING !!! First time tengok dia, ARRGGHHHHH CAIRLAH AKU MACAM NI !! We started talking, we smiled at each other, then I got to know a few things about him. HE SMOKES ! Hmm but never mind. Okay dia kata saya COMEL ! sumpah bestnya ! Haha I had to admit that he has the best looking eyes in the whole wide world. Such a gentleman actually because he bought me panadol for my fever and he actually cared for me. He had this sense of responsibility and possessiveness towards me which I really adore! I am not well here and he is feeling restless there at work. What more can I ask for myself? After he sent me back to my hostel I texted him saying thank you, he replied with a laugh and then he said HE MISSES ME. This is the BEST day of my life and I won't exchange it for any other events in my life !

Love You ,

Sunday, 25 September 2011

Weeeeee ~

Hate me or mock me. I still won't change my mind about you. You were, is and will still be my BABE FOR LIFE until the day I die. Eventhough you're not admitting that you love me too but I still don't care. Kita kawan bukan untuk tinggalkan kawan tu bila2 masa yang kita suka okay. Tak kisahla perangai buruk macam mana pun still takde sape boleh ganti your place in my heart. You're not my sister, not my friend, neither you're my bestest friend. Then who are you actually in my life ? You're the most amazing thing that has happened to me in 18 years I've lived. You're actually my LIFE and I won't ever forget everything you have done for me :D



Okay exams are great until it gets difficult. Duhh of course. Well after my computer exam, I felt like killing myself. SUSAHNYA!! but anyways me and my darlings buat plan pergi KL to loosen up a little bit after all the stress we went through *yeah right*. At 4 we left Shah Alam and reached there at 6. We went to Pavilion, had dinner at Pizza Hut and wanted to go for a movie. ESOK ADA EXAM TAK RETI NAK BALIK KE? HAHAHAHAH so we skipped the plan to watch movies and headed home. Tunggu bas sumpah lama gila, approximately 45 minutes untuk bas U80. And the most AMAZING thing is when the bus arrived, it was freaking full and we had to stand from KL Sentral to Shah Alam. Hehe reached here at 11. Thank God we reached in time before the gate closed :D Whatever and however it was I had fun with MY BESTEST FRIENDS EVER IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD, THANKS GUYS. You guys are the best of friends anyone can have or ask for.


Friday, 23 September 2011


It hurts me the most when the person I love the most hurts my feelings. You being unfaithful to me hurts me but it does not compare to the pain I feel when you start ignoring me. After all that I've done for you and our relationship, the sacrifices I made, the tears I shed, the pain I went through alone just to make sure nothing happens to our relationship but I guess that is just not enough for you right ? It annoys me to think that you actually loved me. Well I should have listened to everyone when I was asked to wake up and get back to reality. You've shattered all that has left in me and left no space for recovery in myself. You were my life, my happiness and my everything. I've not stopped loving you, I still love you the most, its just that I've stopped believing in you.

Wednesday, 14 September 2011

Help Me Please :(

Okay post ni sangat pendek. I just want to say that I miss my old life back. I know I can't turn back the time nor can I change anything right now but I know I can change my future by changing myself right now !
When will I change? There's really no motivation for m e to change but I guess some people do change according to time and age. RIGHT ? I hope so.
I just need some time to think about everything and I hope everyone understands me :)

Need help ,

Thursday, 21 July 2011

Menyusahkan tapi Still Sayang

Kenapa hidup ini kena sentiasa susah bila berkaitan dengan lelaki ? Apa kita yang perempuan ni tak ada hak langsung untuk menyuarakan pendapat dan pandangan kita? Apa kita ni tak ada hak untuk berfikir dan membuat keputusan untuk diri sendiri? Lelaki jangan terlalu ego kerana satu hari nanti diri sendiri akan terkena. Like people always say that life is like a wheel one day you're up and the other day you're down and basically who will be supporting you through those good and bad times ? EXACTLY , it'll be us the LADIES !! Aku tak suka dikongkong tapi orang kata kadang-kadang dalam suatu perhubungan mesti ada yang mengalah so I backed down as always. Aku ni manusia yang berperasaan jugak,nak hidup macam orang lain,nak ada kebebasan memilih kawan dan nak ada cara hidup sendiri. Sentiasa ingat sesuatu,aku akan sentiasa ada dengan kau walau macam mana pun. I love you for who you are and I hope you'll love me for who I am. Tapi apa-apa pun I still terima je. I tak akan merungut sekali pun. That's how much I love you. :)

I'll Love You Till The END !!! ,

Sunday, 17 July 2011

Thank You !!

Thank You So Much Sayang !!
Belum pernah ada yang kata saya COMEL sebelum ini ! Terharu gila sebab awaklah yang pertama tak kira laki or perempuan !! Kekasih hati saya pun tak pernah kata begitu !!
Tak terkata saya!! Lidah kelu kerana tiada perkataan yang dapat menggambarkan perasaan saya ini..
Blog ini menjadi medium untuk menyatakan TERIMA KASIH !! Awak tak tau betapa saya sayangkan awak!! Awaklah hidup saya.. Tak dapat bayangkan hidup tanpa awak sejak kebelakangan ini walaupun kita sentiasa gaduh dan merajuk tapi saya percaya bahawa itu hanya dugaan and dugaan itu hanyalah untuk mengukuhkan lagi hubungan kita sebagai sahabat yang baik !! Tiada orang ke-3 yang boleh merosakkan hubungan kita.. Awak akan saya utamakan sebelum mana-mana orang terutamanya lelaki !!

Sayang Saya,


I'm stucked on you !! But you seem to be ignoring me.. Why ? I really don't understand ??
You seem to be giving me hope but then again, I don't really get it .. I think I'm really falling for you but at least treat me nicely ? Like duhh ... Please understand I'm head over heels on you!! I'm just too shy to say it.. Give me a sign if you have the same feelings as I have right now.. I'm not rushing but at least just a single sign maybe ? Janganlah sombong selalu dengan saya !! Kalau dah online tu tegur la.. takkan nak saya tegur dulu ? Tak gentle kan?
I'm POSITIVE that I really like you but maybe this relationship has to progress slowly or else it'll go wrong right ? Giving you time and the space you need :)


Wednesday, 8 June 2011

Ur My Dear..

Jangan kau berani cakap yang kau nak makan satu papan panadol lagi!!! Or cakap yang kau nak lari!!! Walau ada pape pun,still remember yang I still sayang gile kat you even if kadang-kadang you macam sakai.. I still love you the way you are.. Kalau orang lain don't understand you then stil remember that I do understand you!! Kalau ada yang judge you yang bukan-bukan then remember that I'll never judge you.. Don't be afraid of the world as I would always be by your side helping you.. Promise me that you'll always be by my side and I will surely try to always be there when you need me.. remember that you wwill have me with you through out your life,being your utmost loyal friend.. I know sometimes I can be very annoying,sarcastic and posessive towards you but I know only you can tolerate me that much.. I LOVE YOU FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART !!!!!!!! SyafinazRauf

Love ya forever !!

Monday, 6 June 2011


I MISS you so much!! No matter how much I say that I HATE you but in the end you're STILL the one I think about!! I'm SORRY if I've ever hurt you which I think I never did but I don't get why you're NOT TALKING to me? I have this weird and mixed feelings towards you.. I perasan yang this always happens.. First after a long time you come and meet me then we get very close and you give me HOPE then after a sudden you will make me HATE YOU.. I would be CURSING you all the time.. Then we'll IGNORE each other for a while then you would CHANGE your phone NUMBER and then you would come and meet me again then it will REPEAT until the day we die!! I don't want it to repeat again.. I don't want you giving me HARAPAN PALSU!! JUJUR LA, at least I know APA dalam HATI you.. I tak suka la DIPERBODOHKAN macam ni!!! SKRANG I JUJUR yang I LOVE you so MUCH !!

Yours Always,

Saturday, 4 June 2011

My Friends..

The day I met you was when we were so small..
Initially we were not close but later on it blossomed into a great friendship that we still have today..
You were with me most of the time.. Happy,sad and also heart felling moments,we shared it together..
We cried,laughed,screamed and had fun together..
I'll never forget what you did for me after the 6th of September 2010..
You never judged me neither did I..

The day I met you,I thought you were so childish but later on after knowing you I found out that you were the bestest friend I could ever have!!
You were there with me when HE pushed me and shouted at me..
You were with me when the other HE made me laugh n smile n you were still with me when the same HE BROKE my HEART!!
You were with me eventhough i disturbed you and teased you..
THANK YOU Syafinaz Rauf!!!


Sayang korang,


Hari ini rasanya hari yang tidak mengelirukan..
I think you're just not that heartbreaking I thought u would be..
Semalam aku jumpa kawan-kawan,memang rindu gile sampai aku lupa pasal kau..
Eventhough ada seorang kawan yang memang tengah marah dengan aku.buat bodoh dgn aku tapi semalam aku still happy sebab kawan aku tu senyum setelah dah berapa lama aku tak tengok dy senyum..
And most important aku jumpa kawan kesayanganku Syafinaz Rauf..Bestnya dapat jumpa kau ..
My parents,sister and brother... OH MY,am I excited seeing all of them..
At last I realised that YOU'RE NOT that IMPORTANT after all in MY LIFE!!


Thursday, 2 June 2011

A Brief Life

What is meant by life if no one knows who you are?
What is life if its not filled with cries and laughters?
What is life if you don't have a family to be by your side?
What is life if you don't have friends to share it with?
What is life if you don't care about others?
What is life if we think that there's no one better than us?
What is life if we're not humble?
What is life if you don't respect others and yourself?
What is life if one day you die without a sign?
I learnt that make yourself noticeable and share your life with others..
A HEALTHY LIFE is what you practise, BUT a BLISSFULL LIFE is what you are..

A Humble Typist,

You Jerk !!

I hate you so much!! How could you??
You pretended as though I'm invisible from your life?
I've known you for 3 years,how could you?
I've always been true towards my feeling for you but you've played with my feelings yet again..
You gave me hope and I dreamt of spending my life with you..
You spoilt everything.. Everything went down the drain.. I hate you for making me think that you loved me.. I hate for making me think that you actually cared for me.. I hate you for making me beleive that I was the one in your heart.. I hate you for making my life miserable because my life revolves around you.. I hate you more just because you make me love you so much despite me hating you!!


Sunday, 15 May 2011


You are the best thing that has happened to me..Saya dapat jumpa awak hari tu n saya rasa gembira sangat!!Apalah erti hidup dan ksih sayang tanpa awak di sisi saya??Saya rindu sgt dgn awak,awak tau x??Tak pernah saya segembira ini macam bila saya dapat jmpa dgn awak..Awaklah segala-galanya bagi diri saya..Sudah 3 tahun saya kenal awak dan tak pernah kasih saya terhadap awak berkurang malahan sentiasa bertambah dgn masa..Mungkin awak tak tahu tapi saya syg awak dari dulu lg cuma awak tak pernah nak perasan..Awak sentiasa dikelilingi oleh perempuan-perempuan yang cantik so saya memang wajar diketepikan oleh awak..Percayalah setiap hari saya takkan sempurna kalau tidak memikirkan atau bercakap pasal awak!!Bila awak nak sedar tentang perasaan saya terhadap awak??It's all about you,my life and world revolves around you!!I LOVE YOU MY DEAR!!

Saturday, 14 May 2011

What went wrong???

Aku tak faham apa masalah kau sbnrnya..Aku cube tp still xbley..Maybe sumthing went wrong somewhere in our relationship but aku xrase yg hubungan kite rapuh mcm tuu..Aku knl kau dah hmpir 2 thun lbey tp kau msih xdpt mngenali hati budi aku??Aku sntiasa ambil berat psl kau,back up kau tp mcm nie balasannya??Aku tau perangai kau mmg macam tu tp HELLO!!!!Dgn kawan pun mcm tu ke??Aku rase aq xda bwat pape pun tapi kau still marah aku n aku cube nk mntak maaf tapi kau bwat APA???Kau marah aku n kau TOLAK aku..Sanggup kau bwat macam tu dgn aku??Aku sayang kau sangat,anggap kau kawan yg paling aku rapat sekali n macam nie aku dibalas..TERIMA KASIH LA !!!!Bnda bkn terjadi sebab aku,sebab org lain n aku yg terpaksa trime hukumannya??N plus bnda yg terjadi tu kecik sgt tp sebab EGO kau yg besar tu.....Hmmm
Aku malas la nk cakap dgn kau..Kalau kau rase kau btol then FINE!!Aku xnk buang masa mnyakitkan hati aku..Aku pun xkan lama dgn kau..Tak lama lg aku da tak ada kat sini n aku harap kau tau yang aku xpernah berniat nk gaduh-gaduh dgn kau..

Jangan la marah-marah dengan aku lagi :)